Pet or Paradox. . . Owner or Steward?

Pamela Clark
May 2001

At one time, I was blissfully unaware of what I might term the “sadder” side of parrot keeping. It wasn’t too long ago. I knew only of my own pleasure at the exotic smell of my beloved Amazon’s head, the delight I felt as my Grey screamed, “Let me out!” upon waking in the morning, the softening of my heart as my Umbrella Cockatoo laid his head upon my chest while I preened his pin feathers. To me, it was all magic. And, I was the luckiest person in the world to have and live alongside these creatures whom I could only describe to myself as magnificent. To this day, I have never gotten over the wonder of holding my Blue and Gold Macaw, and feeling the softness of his cheek against mine, as he vows, “Oh…I love!” to me.

As my love for them all grew, so did my knowledge. I began to work more and more closely with other owners, finally coming to work as an avian behavior consultant. This work, and the contact it brings me with others, has given me another view of parrot keeping. A view just as valid and real, but quite different. A painful view…so painful that some days I must turn off the phone and go to dig the soil in my garden to repair my perspective.

Parrots have become tremendously popular as companion animals. So popular that Kaytee Manufacturing has launched its “Preferred Birds” program on both east and west coasts.  In this program they market over a hundred thousand baby parrots each year through PetsMart stores. There is money to be made in parrots.                    

The flip side of the coin is that to someone just introduced to birds, these creatures are so magical that they are worth every penny of the purchase. Parrots affect us in a way that no other companion animal does. They appeal to the child within us. They are the stuff of which fairy tales are crafted…feathers so brightly hued that we stand spellbound upon first viewing some of them. Wildish creatures, who nevertheless allow us to cuddle and hold them… creatures who speak to us in our own language with cognition. Who could resist taking home a creature that is not only exquisitely beautiful, but also capable of speaking to us in our own language? Not many. The truth is that most first parrots are purchased upon impulse, with little knowledge of their true nature. Given their qualities, this is most understandable.

And the reason I go dig in my garden some days? Just what is that painful view of which I spoke above? Because these same beloved parrots, the ones who so enchanted us upon first meeting are being given away by the hundreds on a daily basis. At the moment, I have 19 companion parrots, 16 of which were given to me as “unmanageable.” On a daily basis, I get calls from people who can no longer deal with the behavior problems their parrots demonstrate and don’t know what to do with them. The words “get rid of” are the ones used, and there is resentment, anger, and desperation in the voices that use them.

There are many rescue organizations and sanctuaries across the nation, and they are full. They have waiting lists. There is literally nowhere for these unwanted parrots to go. It is anticipated that large-scale euthanasia, our method of dealing with unwanted dogs and cats, is right around the corner in terms of dealing with the unwanted parrot problem.

Why? What is going wrong? What are the answers that will prevent this problem from growing? If you have made it this far in the article, then you are a friend of mine. I’m well aware that whenever I write about this topic, I’m making people miserable. It certainly is not a “feel good” subject. However, those of us with the love, the commitment, and the strength, will stand still in the pain and look for solutions. We must keep analyzing the situation in order to equip ourselves with the knowledge that will allow us to be part of the solution. Considering all things regarding parrot keeping these days, each of us is either part of the problem, or part of the solution. Those of you still reading are clearly part of the solution, and I am grateful to you in my heart of hearts.

Many problems have become evident that contribute to the numbers of unwanted parrots. First, commonly-used breeding practices contribute greatly to the issue. Complex, emotional creatures who, had they been reared by their natural parents in the wild, would have received ongoing care for many months, are instead isolated from others of their species, weaned too early and prevented from ever learning that most necessary of avian skills…flying. In short, common rearing practices stunt the emotional and intellectual growth of young parrots in such a way that their “pet potential” is irrevocably compromised.

Second, young parrots are sold to people who have no knowledge about birds…no idea that they are taking an essentially wild creature into their homes. In most cases, no education is provided to these new owners. They have no idea that problem behaviors will crop up sooner or later with even the best of parrots. Nor do they know how to respond when they do.

Adding to the creation of problems, these same parrots are fed inadequate diets, inappropriate to their species; and are kept in environments that provide only a fraction of the stimulation they need in order to live healthylives. The exercise they enjoy is minimal compared with the hundreds of miles they might fly each day in the wild. The social interaction they receive is scheduled around our own busy work and social obligations, and comes nowhere near addressing their real needs.

These problems and others are, however, obvious and answerable problems. Knowledge regarding the solutions for these more pragmatic problems is growing daily as well. Publications such as the Pet Bird Report, the Original Flying Machine, the Holistic Bird Newsletter and others are testimony to the fact that soon, caring parrot owners will have many more answers and ideas for improving the quality of their parrots’ lives.

In a fuller sense, however, there are other, more serious and less easily-definable problems in our parrot keeping…problems with less obvious solutions. What I often find myself musing about is the manner in which we view parrots, in terms of their place in our own lives. Henry Beston, author of “The Outermost House” once wrote, “We need another and a wiser and perhaps a more mystical concept of animals….” I agree, but I believe that his statement is even truer if we apply it solely to parrots as companions. We run into trouble, both personally and as a culture, when we allow ourselves to view parrots in the same manner in which we view our domesticated pets.

Most parrot owners now realize that their birds are not domesticated, even though they have been reared in captivity. They are essentially identical in every way to their wild cousins. And yet, on a subconscious level, we tend to have the same expectations of them as we do of our domesticated pets. The second, and closely related, major problem with our view of parrots is that we do not recognize them as sexual creatures, nor do we recognize the ramifications of this in our lives with them. Nevertheless, the day we purchase and bring home our young parrot, our expectations are no different than those we entertain the day we bring home our new puppy or kitten.

Since the 19^th century, there has been a dramatic and continual growth in the popularity of domestic pets. This has been such a profound phenomenon that, beginning in the 1960’s, the human-animal bond began to become the subject of serious study…study, which has proven many times over, the many benefits to humans, both physically and psychologically, of keeping companion animals.

For example, numerous studies have proven that pets can help to lower blood pressure during stressful situations and to increase the survival rates for heart attack patients. They improve the quality of life for seniors, provide a sense of emotional stability for foster children, and help patients in psychiatric institutions work through anxiety and despair. It has been shown that keeping pets reduces overall the number of minor health problems in the general population. The list of benefits to us of keeping pets is a long one. So widely recognized have these studies become that today even the practice of pet-facilitated psychotherapy is not unusual, since often patients will relax and open up more readily in the presence of an animal. However, all of these studies and their findings have been based upon the relationships we have with domesticated pets.

Since the vast majority of parrot owners purchase their first baby parrots with little or no information, they cannot help but carry into this new relationship, the same expectations that they have learned are appropriate to the other human-animal relationships they have had. If any pet owner were asked to describe simply the benefit to him of his relationship with a dog or cat, he would probably describe the feeling of being loved that is so present. Generally speaking, dogs and cats adore us and ask very little in return. Their physical presence is reassuring and calming.

Parrots too, especially when they are young, make us feel loved. Not only that, their presence in our lives make us feel special. However, that same cuddly cockatoo one day grows into a sexually mature, competitive, loud, dramatic and powerful presence in our household. How does he make us feel then, especially if we lack the skills with which to deal with these new and unexpected behaviors?  I would assert that most parrots lose their homes simply because, by virtue of growing up, they lose the ability to make us feel the way we want and expect them to make us feel.

Thus, as Mr. Beston so wisely wrote, “we need another and a wiser” way of viewing these creatures in our lives. I like to suggest to a client that, instead of looking at that stunningly beautiful large macaw as his possession, his “pet,” that instead, he pretend that this creature is the equivalent of a magnificent country estate over which he has been granted stewardship for as long as he is alive to enjoy it…with the stipulation that he leave the “holding” in better condition than when he was given it.

Parrots are our link with the wild. They are the interface between the wild and man in civilization. They are not ours to use…but to care for, to understand, to protect, and to honor. They are in our lives for a different purpose than to provide succor to us in our frailty.

Many other musings stir my thinking each day, and I will share just one more with you now. If we are failing parrots in captivity, it is not only in our view of them, in our expectations that they will provide emotional comfort to us, it is also in our lack of understanding of the emotional lives they themselves lead.

It is a well-known fact that, within the context of all relationships, we tend to do to others, human and animal alike, what we do to ourselves. One of the largest problems I find when I consult with clients regarding their parrots, is their lack of understanding about their parrots’ emotional lives. In our busy and stressful society, it has become almost a survival skill to close ourselves off from our own emotions. Each of us lives with too many demands, and distancing ourselves from our own feelings is sometimes the only way we can manage to keep going…to keep working for the same employer…to keep attending those family gatherings…to stay married to the same spouse. As we have distanced ourselves from nature physically, we have distanced ourselves from our innermost selves emotionally. A dangerous business spiritually…and a dangerous practice if we are keeping parrots, who are our closest link to that more natural world.

Our practice of numbing ourselves from our own pain leads us to underestimate and misunderstand the emotional lives of our parrot companions. While to some, the suggestion of the “emotional life” of a parrot may elicit feelings of skepticism, proof of the validity of this is not hard to find. A technique called positron emission tomography (PET) scans and documents the activity in different parts of the human brain associated with particular emotional states, such as anger or fear. It has now been shown that the same activity takes place in the brains of animals when they are experiencing similar states. Thus, while is has been popular historically to view parrots and other birds as dumb and unfeeling, there is now little scientific support for these ideas. In fact, additional books documenting evidence of their intelligence and sophisticated social interactions are being published with increasing frequency each year.

If I were asked to name the two biggest problems with parrot keeping practices in captivity, I would not hesitate to name nutrition and the manner in which we neglect the social quality of their lives. Parrots, as flock animals…as prey animals…cannot possibly live with a sense of safety and contentment, if the “health” of the flock has any defects or impairments. Parrots are exuberant, active creatures who thrive among numbers of other exuberant, happy, active creatures…whether feathered or not. Pretty adaptable, they can easily create a flock for themselves out of a couple of dogs, another parrot or two, and a few reasonably happy individuals. Although few would suspect this to be true, some of the unhappiest parrots with whom I deal are single African Grey parrots who live with a couple without children…especially if that couple experiences the normal, or greater, stresses usually present in any marriage.

Simply put, emotions have energy and parrots are some of the most empathic creatures on earth. So finely tuned to each other, a flock of parrots can “turn on a dime” when flying, to change direction. They are “sensitive receivers” of our feelings and moods, and need to be protected through the creation of parrot-keeping practices, which provide greater reassurance to them on an emotional and survival level.

This is not difficult to achieve, but must be undertaken consciously. Parrots need predictability. They need ritual and fun, laughter and happiness. They need to be included in our own social activities. They also need us to slow our own energy down and take the time to make a true psychic connection with them…to talk to them in context…to pay attention to what scares them and take this seriously. They need us to try to create a flock dynamic with the few creatures living in our homes…to make the most of playing music and structuring social times.

Each day, we need to focus on them, shutting out our busy thoughts, and express, out loud, the love we feel for them. I do not think that “conditionality” is a quality of a parrot-parrot bond. Let them know that we love them unconditionally…that we will not forsake them…that we will hold them in our hearts and hands with respect and treasure them as the remarkable gifts they are.

Simple words…those above. However, the accomplishment of such simple suggestions may not be easy unless we also attend to our own healing…become a little truer to our own selves…honor our own happiness a little more. As we learn to heal our own inner lives, we will begin to honor ourselves. We will then honor those undomesticated lives amongst us, being less quick to “get rid” of them when they present problems. And, ultimately, this will lead to our knowing better how to honor the earth and all living creatures. As Allen M. Schoen, DVM puts it so eloquently in his book, “Kindred Spirits,” “…there is a worthy triad of goals to be addressed: the healing of people, the healing of animals, and the healing of the environment.”